It’s the first Wednesday of the month, which means I’m linking up with some of my favorite ladies to show off some Valentine’s Day style. I’m also sharing a hot take regarding Valentine’s Day {and beyond} for your single friends; please stop asking everyone why they’re single!
BTW, don’t forget to enter the $500 Target giveaway before it ends!
Hot Take: Please Stop Asking Me How I'm Still Single Click To Tweet{This post may contain affiliate and/or referral links. I may receive a small commission at no extra cost to you if you make a purchase through a link in this post. Thank you for your support of What Nicole Wore.}
Featured | A Rant: Please Stop Asking Me How I’m Still Single:
A Rant: Please Stop Asking Me How I’m Still Single | Gang’s All Here!
Be sure to check out everyone’s How I Style It to help get you all of your Valentine’s and Galentine’s looks!
Teamed up with my blogger pals to help you get ready for Valentine's Day! Click To TweetBright on a Budget: Blog | Facebook | Pinterest | Instagram | Bloglovin’ | Twitter
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A Rant: Please Stop Asking Me How I’m Still Single | But Why?
Well for starters: it’s rude. I mean imagine if I came up to you and said, “Wow I can’t BELIEVE that YOU’RE married!” You might be offended. That’s how it feels when everyone I meet {slight exaggeration but not really} immediately wants to give me their feedback on my lack of relationship status. While your intentions may be pure, I’d much rather just hear a compliment about my brains, heart, beauty, creativity, etc.
Everyone I meet wants to give their feedback on my lack of relationship. Please stop: Click To TweetRELATED: How I Want to Grow This Year
So I see you. I know someone’s reading this and thinking, “Nicole, I just want to tell my friend that she’s a REAL catch!” I get it. Building your friends up is awesome and something we should all do regularly. But consider this: maybe she doesn’t want to be in a relationship. Maybe she’s working on herself for herself by herself {YASSSSS girl!}. Maybe she has extremely high standards. Maybe she just doesn’t want to date someone!
Not everyone wants to be in a relationship; consider that before asking someone why they're single. Click To TweetRELATED: Seeing Red for Valentine’s Day: Affordable Style Picks
A Rant: Please Stop Asking Me How I’m Still Single | Think About the Wording
If you genuinely want to have a conversation with someone about why they’re single, there are more tactful ways to ask. “How are you single,” implies that there’s some dark, secret reason that they’re not in a relationship. There could be a dark or private reason that’s none of your business so knowing that, it may be more appropriate to let them steer the conversation. Does your friend bring up dates they went on? Ask them what they liked or disliked about the person! Is your friend blue and talking about a past relationship? Be supportive by listening!
How to Be Supportive of Your Single Friends That Are Dating: Click To TweetRELATED: LuLaRoe Valentine’s Leggings
Still think “how are you single?” isn’t that bad? Again, consider how you’d feel if someone asked, “how are you in a long term relationship?!”
A Rant: Please Stop Asking Me How I’m Still Single | How You Can Support Your Single Friends
Let me preface this by saying single people are all different! Not everyone is going to be sad about not having a significant other for Valentine’s Day. Really! But if you have a friend that is bummed out, there’s a number of sweet small gestures you can make.
Sweet and small gestures for your friends are the BEST! Click To TweetRELATED: Friday Fun: Creating a Bestie Box
- Send them a card // I love getting mail from friends and loved ones.
- Plan a Girls’ Day In or Out // This could be as simple as planning a day to go to lunch and shopping or be a fun Galentine’s party – more on that tomorrow!
- Make them a playlist // I am always looking for more jams to rock out during dance parties.
A Rant: Please Stop Asking Me How I’m Still Single | The Outfit
This love & happiness sweatshirt was an immediate add to cart for me; I love the stripes and every time I see it I start singing Al Green’s, “Love and Happiness” – not a bad thing! Sadly, it’s since sold out online, but if you happen to swing by a LOFT store, check your clearance section as it was marked down. One of the things I really like about this is that it’s a thicker knit; I wouldn’t quite go so far as to call it a sweatshirt, but it’s a good weight for winter while still being something I’d feel comfortable wearing to a business casual office.
The @loft sweater that has me singing Al Green: Click To TweetRELATED: Simple Winter Uniform, $500 Target Giveaway, + Closet Staples You Need
I paired it here with my favorite black work pant to make it more business casual appropriate, but you could dress it down for the weekend or a casual dinner date with black, blue, or gray jeans. {I think it would look super cute with red skinny jeans or pants as well!} I knew I wanted to tie in the red for this Valentine’s Day inspired How I Style It so I pulled out a red leather tote that can carry it all, a buffalo plaid vest, and these red statement earrings. The result was an outfit that appears pretty effortless but still has a fun pattern mix and isn’t over the top with pink and red. What’s your Valentine’s Day style?
Lindsay Latimer says
YES girl. People can be SO rude. People ask me all the time why we’re not married yet… it’s a personal thing. I would never ask anyone those kinds of questions. Keep being your awesome self!
Betsy says
I feel the same way when people ask me about us having kids!
Lily says
I can totally see why this can get annoying — I hate when people ask us, so when are y’all having kids. Over and over again.
Love this sweatshirt!
Ada says
That Love+Happiness tee is perfect for VDay, especially with the red buffalo print vest. Love this look. You killed it. It is casual yet so put together, Nicole.
Welcome by tomorrow and every Thursday and linkup your amazing style with me. =)
Tori says
I hate when people ask me why I’m single! Especially when boys ask. I’m like…. uh because I want to be? None of your business hahaha
Tori
http://www.mooretori.com
Annaliese says
Uh YES to this!! Several people in the last week have asked me if I’m dating anyone and it really rubbed me the wrong way, especially given the circumstances for why I’m not dating at this time!
xoxo A
http://www.southernbelleintraining.com
Courtney Hoffman says
THANK YOU. I’ve been single pretty much my entire adult life. Dating has never been a priority for me. Even when I was little I never played house or planned out my wedding. I don’t know why I’m wired that way, but I am. I’m perfectly happy with my dog and my lack of a man haha. I can’t count how many times I’ve had to explain to people that it actually hurts my feelings to have them constantly second guessing my choices and subtly (or sometimes not-so-subtly) suggesting they know what’s best for me better than I do. I know they mean well, but it’s judgmental and a bit condescending. We’re all different and it’s important to be respectful of other people’s choices. It’s so refreshing hearing/seeing other people speaking out about things like this–it makes me feel like maybe I’m not some isolated crazy person haha
the sophia diaries says
yeah, i’m not single, but i know that my single friends hate it when other people ask them that, so one some levels i totally get what you mean!
Jenny says
I hated being asked that when I was single…My response was always because I’m working on myself for myself BY MYSELF. lol slightly kidding but there’s nothing wrong with being single.
Emily says
People can be so judgemental and thoughtless. Your post really put things in perspective; preach, girl!
-Emily
https://norepeatsorhesitations.com/2018/02/07/10-things-to-watch-before-the-winter-olympics/
Tee says
It’s also very, very rude when women say to other women, you’re so skinny! How is that ok but if a woman said you’re so overweight she would be crucified. Both are rude. It needs to be brought to women’s attention because somehow they think it’s perfectly ok to make rude comments to thin women.
Elise says
Love this post, you are so right, it is just rude. Love this look too, your top is darling!
xx, Elise
http://www.sparkleandslippers.blogspot.com
Becky says
Love this outfit! People sometimes try to be nice by saying things like this but they just don’t always get that it’s not the message everyone wants to hear!
Alix Maza says
This outfit is so cute! Love the shirt and the earrings.
Kylie says
Love the ways to support friends! So adorable for all ladies!
Cameron - Diary of a Southern Millennial says
I think it’s kind of a compliment in a way if that makes sense, but totally see how it would be an insult too! But honestly, everyone just needs to keep their crazy un-asked-for opinions about other people’s lives to themselves anyway haha. I get it ALL the time about how I don’t want kinds (like ever) and someone has gone so far as to say I’m selfish for it. People can be so rude!
Maureen says
Love your vest! It’s such a classic print and piece. I know what you mean about people asking about XYZ. Before I dated, I got asked why I wasn’t dating. When I started dating, I got asked, how come I wasn’t married yet. When I got married, I got the notorious question of how come I don’t have kids yet and what was taking so long! Can you imagine the nerve?!! I never said this out loud but every time I got asked these type of questions the only thought going through my head was to tell that person to get a life and stop asking about mine. I mean seriously. If I wanted to share that info, trust me you’d be the first to know but I guess they never thought of it that way! Ha!
Maureen | http://www.littlemisscasual.com
April says
It’s amazing how people can be so rude and insensitive sometimes. I’m sure they think they mean well. I hope you have a fun Galentine’s day! And by the way I love your shirt!
McKenna bleu says
I hear ya girl. Love that tee! Perfect for Feb!
Lacey says
This goes right up there with babies! If it doesn’t concern you don’t ask! Whew!
xx,
Lacey
Logan says
Yassss girl this question is so annoying!! Especially because it implies that something must be wrong with you if you’re not in a relationship, but you don’t need another person to make you complete and kick ass!
Logan | signedlogan.com