4 Things I Learned About Life at Sigma Kappa Convention

Hi friends! Last week I headed to Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida for my sorority’s national convention.  This was my first time attending and I was completely unsure of what to expect.  Would I learn a lot? Would I meet people? I’m so happy to share that I’m very glad I went and left the long weekend feeling inspired AF. While I had tons of takeaways from Sigma Kappa convention that were relevant beyond my volunteer role, I wanted to share four that I think all of us can use.

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4 Things I Learned About Life at Sigma Kappa Convention | Nothing in Life is Perfect

One of the reasons I’m passionate about volunteering with my sorority is that it IS a women’s organization.  The purpose is to encourage growth and provide tools for development for college aged women.  But in the past I’ve struggled personally with public perception over the fact that so often sororities are not seen as inclusive groups.  Being a person of color I notice these things {almost immediately} and questioning them is just second nature to me.  Being in the south, asking these questions is often seen as impolite, but I’m a firm believer that ignoring the elephant in the room doesn’t get progress.

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When making the decision of whether or not to attend Sigma Kappa convention, I struggled with whether or not attending was supporting a rate of change that quite frankly, I’ve felt is slow.  I myself have questioned why sororities tend to showcase members that look a certain way, why the work we do advocating for mental health resources for women isn’t more publicly highlighted, and why talks about body positivity are limited to meeting rooms.  I got to ask all of these questions this weekend and was reminded of this: loving something does not mean not challenging or questioning it.  In fact, I would argue that if you love something, you SHOULD challenge it.

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So do I think my national organization could do better? Hell yes.  Do I think they’re making attempts to get stronger in the areas I was concerned about? Without a doubt.  This weekend made me more comfortable volunteering my time and money, because I got to see that so many of my Sigma Kappa sorority sisters are passionate about and concerned by the same issues I am.

BTW, this may seem like a ‘duh, Nicole’ conclusion, but was one I’ve struggled with in my years as a volunteer.  Not terribly long ago, I mentioned on Stories that something we can do to hold brands accountable is to look at how frequently they show minorities on social media.  I ended up cringing when someone privately messaged me pointing out that my sorority hadn’t featured a woman of color in over two months and that it had been even longer that someone that wasn’t skinny was featured.

I think remembering that these organizations are comprised of hundreds of individuals helps. The feelings we have for member organizations often are similar to the ones we have with another human being in that we can love them but still want {and even expect} that changes continue to be made.

Conversations about diversity and inclusion will continue to happen; it’s important that we support organizations and businesses that have embraced this and keep questioning organizations and companies that are slower to get on board.

4 Things I Learned About Life at Sigma Kappa Convention | Adulthood Equals Paperwork

One thing to know: adulthood is a lot of knowing how to properly fill out paperwork.  Maybe 80% of living well requires being able to do this.  Insurance, paying bills, buying a car or house, taxes, getting a new job, etc.  This is definitely one of the skills that being an officer in a sorority gives young women.  While definitely not a fun aspect, at least for most, it’s the kind of real life preparation that eventually allows women to live their best life.

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Also, I’ll feel successful when I reach a point where someone else does all my paperwork for me.  In the meantime, you can find me volunteering to show young women how to do these things with the hope that they are better at learning these skills than I was.  At each Sigma Kappa convention, some of our collegiate sisters receive awards for being able to fill out paperwork well in reporting what their chapters are doing.  Doing the right things is important, but knowing how to tell people about you doing the right thing is more important in our society.  {We can debate about if that’s the right mindset all day, but that’s how it is.}

4 Things I Learned About Life at Sigma Kappa Convention | There’s No In Between

One of the speakers we heard from made a statement somewhat along these lines, “You can’t live our values 75% of the time.  You either are living our values or you’re not.”  It really resonated with me because I think people often look at this as a gray issue.  There are still some things that are black and white.  The Sigma Kappa value I most closely cherish is personal growth; I’m either working towards personal growth or I’m wasting my time.  Period.  The end.

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In the same manner, I think we decide what’s important to us.  Is something important to you or no?  There’s no, “my family is important to me 50% of the time.”  You either care or you don’t — I think keeping this in mind is so important when making decisions both long-term and in the day to day.

4 Things I Learned About Life at Sigma Kappa Convention | Comfort Zones are Lame

I’m a creature of habit and a creature that enjoys avoiding any anxiety producing situations {just keeping it really real}.  Volunteering with Sigma Kappa has always pushed me out of my comfort zone and while sometimes that stresses me out, I can’t think of a time when I’ve regretted allowing the sorority to push me to do more.  Going to a convention and rooming with a stranger definitely stressed me out {y’all I sleep with my eyes open and talk in my sleep….}, but was such a cool experience and gave me a new sister friend.

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Joining the public relations team for the sorority made me question if I really was experienced enough, good enough, etc.  While questioning myself in this way is kind of just part of my personality, doing so has really made me feel like I’m making a difference and working in an area that I’m super passionate about.  For me living my best life means knowing I made a difference in others’ lives and Sigma Kappa has given me many opportunities to do just that both in my local community and in the larger national organization.